My thoughts about marriage: Japan vs Switzerland
Do I want to marry?
I am thinking much about marriage lately, because many people who I know are currently in this situation. Tatsuya and I talked about it, too. We just want to know if we think the same way and what our goals are.
Tradition vs modern age
We found out that he is more traditional than me. Marriage definitely is more important for him. I am not against it. Don’t get me wrong, but there are many things to consider. I am not the person who wants to run into something without checking the law and consequences.
Rights of a spouse
I know that women are still not equally treated, not in Switzerland, not in Japan. The pension is just one example. A married couple receives 150% of the rent in total. If the man retires first, he will receive the full rent. If the woman retire first, she will receive only the minimum. So 100% is for the man and 50% for the woman. This is maybe why many people live in a concubine or even don’t marry in Switzerland.
In Japan it’s actually similar. As soon as the woman has children, her pension will be reduced. Well, it’s much more complicated, but if you want to read more about it, I recommend you to read this article: dawncenter
Lifestyle after marriage
I really want to have a good live and pay the kids (if I ever have any) a good school or even a year abroad. I think the best would be, if I work as hard as possible. On the other hand, the children need their parents. My wish is that both parents work 80% so that both of them have time to take care of the kids for at least one day per week. The father shouldn’t be just a “money giver” and the mother shouldn’t be just the “house keeper and child educator”.
Sadly there are still men who say “I only want a woman, because I need someone who cooks and does the household. I don’t mind if she wants kids. She will take care of them anyway. So I’ve got nothing to do with it.”
Think about what you want
I don’t think that any women will be happy to live in such a strict traditional family. Maybe we are still brain-washed. All I need is a person who is honest, wants to make things clear, even when it hurts and doesn’t think like the people from the Middle Ages or the ancient world.
When love is involved, and when the “test of living together” worked well, I am totally happy to get married. I want to live together with my boyfriend, even though it’s not common in Japan.
If you want to know more about the legal situation of marriage, I recommend you to read the official websites of the governement. Their information is 100% correct.
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